If fast food restaurants were women, I’d have several girlfriends.
My favorite would be Jack in the Box. Those deep fried tacos have no peer, and its curly fries — sorry — seasoned fries have made it very easy to break up with my rarely seen girlfriend, Arby’s. I also appreciate Jack’s edgy commercials and Diet Dr. Pepper.
A close second is McDonald’s. Grilled chicken club does the job, but how do you beat McDonald’s fries? Seriously?
In-N-Out has been eyeing me for years. I never understood the appeal. Fatburger always won out over In-N-Out because Fatburger had a great jukebox, more juice (or was that grease?) in their burgers, and a heavy hand with the pepper shaker.
But recently I’ve been seduced by the Double Double at In-N-Out.
Then there’s KFC, Taco Bell, Tommy’s and to a lesser extent Wendy’s, Carl’s Jr., and that shady no-name burger joint with a huge broken sign poorly advertising something to do with Pastrami.
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I am a bachelor, I enjoy eating in my car — tell me the cross streets and I will give you your three closest options for food delivered through a small window.
With that said, I have found that avoiding all of my girlfriends has been easy. In fact, I learned that what I had to break wasn’t the taste of the delectable but ridiculously unhealthful delights, but that I had to get out of the routine of picking up something on the way to work, and then on the way home.
Yes, I miss hot french fries and ketchup, extra crispy white meat, and double-decker tacos. But I found I only miss those things when I think of them.
If I have a granola bar in my car, I’ll eat it and keep driving. If I have a little bottle of water I will drink it instead of persuading myself I’m getting sleepy and need a Coke. So guess what, I now have a box of granola bars in my car, and several bottles of water in the trunk. It’s not that hard.
This coming from a man deeply in love with his girlfriends.
When I travel overseas I always, always, always check out the McDonald’s. What weird menu items do they have? What do the fries taste like. Wait, they have beer?
Being in McDonald’s in a strange and foreign land is often times as good as going to one of their famous museums. I am looking everywhere, reading everything, and soaking it all in.
My first job was at McDonald’s, and when I retire I want my last job to be at McDonald’s.
Once I drove around this beautiful country and when you’re traveling like that you have to eat and you have to relieve yourself. Guess who constantly had the cleanest bathrooms? And not only did McDonald’s let you use the facilities but they never asked any questions. Not many restaurants are like that.
Unfortunately there’s not a lot of food to eat at these restaurants when you’re watching your figure so instead of flipping through your copy of “Eat This, Don’t Eat That,” it’s much easier to just make a beeline home and make a sandwich.
Food on Thursday: Banana for breakfast. Grilled salmon, brown rice, salad, Diet Coke for lunch. Sushi, one beer, half a bottle of sake for dinner. Exercise: Worked out at the gym for 90 minutes.
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